“Love seeketh not itself to please,
Nor for itself hath any care,
But for another gives its ease,
And builds a Heaven in Hell’s despair.”
So sung a little Clod of Clay
Trodden with the cattle’s feet,
But a Pebble of the brook
Warbled out these metres meet:
“Love seeketh only self to please,
To bind another to its delight,
Joys in another’s loss of ease,
And builds a Hell in Heaven’s despite.”
William Blake – The Clod and the Pebble
You only have to zip down through that poem a few times to point out the juxtaposition of two loves. One love is selfless and the other is selfish. You might be foolish enough to think there is no such thing as selfish love, but there is. For they’re the same. Love tends to be not only a thing but something we do. Maybe even something we can have or hold. In that sense, the Clod seeks to offer love to others and bestow them with all the virtues that accompany such selflessness. While the Pebble seeks to covet love, or worse, use love for its own gain.
When was the last time you evaluated your motivations for love? Are you worthy of it? Do you give it freely without demanding it in reciprocity? And just so we’re clear, I’m speaking about the loves other than Greek Agape. Eros, Starge, and Philia. Romantic, familial, and brotherly respectively.
I’m tickled to say that I’m doing better than average in most of those categories across the board. However, I do find myself craving love from others. I wouldn’t say that I’m the Pebble, in that I use love for personal gain, but I’m unhappy when I don’t receive it. …Or worse, I don’t receive it on the terms I think I deserve or prefer.
Yes, if you think I have work to do, you’re correct. I do. I know that Christ came to fulfill the Law. He proved it. I know that he corrected the early Jews who managed to make something very complex into something simple – Love Him and love one another. We don’t have to wonder what love is. We’re told specifically.
Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, 5 does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, 6 does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; 7 bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
1st Corinthians 13:4-7 (NASB)
Why do we get this so wrong so often? We’re out of practice loving one another. It is that simple.
Can you tell ANY family member you have you love them? And I’m not talking about your son or your mom. I’m talking about that weird cousin who stares at you during the family reunion. Yeah, that one… You love him, don’t you? What about a sister or brother at church? Can you eke out those words to them? Could you possibly tell a stranger you love them? If you can’t say yes to these questions, how do you think you’ll be able to love them if you can barely think about it without freaking out?
I don’t know how to help anyone with this one other than recalling, as best you can, the first time you truly understood what it meant to love God and love others. That’s the baseline. You can build from there. Maybe we’re just not used to offering our love vocally. We might not be adept at loving at all. But one thing is certain… We were built to love. Do you know how I know? God doesn’t command you to do something you have no hope of doing. For God IS Love with a capital “L” in every sense. There is precious little room for the Pebble. Rather the Clod.
If we are to be salt and light, it requires a foundation of Love. I pray it be so with you all.
